Tuesday, October 13, 2009

So Much to Talk About

Ok, I realize it has been a while, but geez it is very difficult to write when you have no internet access at home, and are completely busy at work! I hate not having a connection at the house, I feel like we are living back in the day of the encyclopedia!!!

So, Let me just start with the beginning of my first week. The company that I am working for provides us bikes to ride while we are staying here, island life is very simple and everything is nearby so there is no need for me to drive most of the time. Anyway, I am super excited about my bike- all I can think about is "Sweet, maybe I will get into shape while I am here, you know riding around everywhere!" This, in whole, is a large misconception because work is like 0.4 miles away from where I live! I don't think riding that FAR is going to do a thing for these thighs! So it is the first day of work and I am about to hop on this bike for the first time, actually, hop on ANY bike for the first time in a LONG LONG TIME. (Please picture this) I hop on the bike and I am about to start going, which I think is a great start, but we have a little like sidewalk path that you have to ride down before you can get to the open parking lot....apparently I have ZERO balance because the path was small and making me steer all crazy to try and stay on it. Anyway, one of the tires goes off the side of path causing me to go with it, nailing my crotch and catching the inside of my thigh on the bar that connects the seat to the handlebars. Needless to say that my pride was hurt more than anything, although, I do have a significantly large bruise on my inner thigh....nice seeing as how I am in a swimsuit 5 days a week!


As luck would have it I was only the new girl for about 3 days and then another girl from Germany showed up, thus making her the "new girl." I was relieved that my turn as the newbie was over as quickly as it had started and now it was my turn to show this new-new girl around. Hopefully I would do a better job than was done for me- (Nothing like missing a meeting on your first day of work because your WONDERFUL roomies forgot to tell you that you had one- and it wasn't on the schedule...assholes). Anyway, she needed to go to the grocery store and I am one of two that actually drove down here, so I offered to take her to Publix. OMG it was like one of the most entertaining things I have ever experienced!

Wow, where do I begin with this? First thing she walks in, grabs a cart and literally screams "ONE OF THESE?" My reply was "yes" and again she screams "Let's go shopping." I was no where near as excited as she was about what was to come...nonetheless I felt like it was my duty as an American citizen to show the newbie around the store lol! She had made a list, which was a good start, so I just thought we would go down the list and I would just search for the isle that we needed. I am still not very familiar with the store at this point. When I asked her what the first thing on the list was....she read it to me in German....HELLO, I have no idea what you just said!!!! So we start walking and pass one of those cereal displays. You know, the kind that is sponsored by one brand and just has a few of the cereals that they offer. Well she was ECSTATIC! She was like "HOOF, SO MUCH DECISION, I DON'T KNOW!" I was "Oh no, this is just one display, the cereal isle is here." WOW- I have never EVER seen anyone so excited about cereal. The black lady standing next to us looked at the new girl in amazement and just died laughing, I explained that it was "the little things in life," and we carried on. Next was the "JUICE" isle. I don't drink juice unless it is mixed with something alcoholic so I could have cared less, but again, utter excitement. This continues on until we have finally gotten everything on the list and go stand in line to check out, which is where things get extremely interesting!

The new girl takes everything out of her cart and puts it on the little moving belt to be scanned. As she finishes, the bagger; which happens to be an older gentleman that a appears to be around 60 something, grabs her cart and rolls it over near him- you know, to put the groceries back in when he is done. LOL, the new girl grabs the cart from him and pulls it back over to her so he tries one more time to get the cart and then concedes. He just looks at her like she is crazy and begins to bag her stuff. He grabs some grapes, bananas, and apples and is about to put them in a bag when she literally jumps over the payment area and takes everything from him, I not kidding, she is practically laying on top of her stuff, wrapping her arms around it. I am about to die laughing when  I realized what was going on. In between cracking up I try and explain that he is not trying to steal her things, he is just doing his job. I explained that this is what happens in America when you go to the store, unless you choose to use a U-SCAN! The Latina cashier looks at her in amazement and says "Girl, where you from!?"  She says "Germany" and the cashier says "You gotta do that yourself where you live?" I mean, REALLY!

Needless to say, it was the most memorable trip to the store that I have ever had!

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